In Defense of The Friend Zone by Abby Jimenez

Rating: 3 Stars (Originally 5)

After getting my first Abby Jimenez book from a Little Library, I wanted to give all of her books a chance. And let me tell you, they are so popular that, through the local library, the digital versions all had wait lists. Since graduating with my Masters, I have been in a place where I am buying less books and supporting local libraries by borrowing.

One of the first books that my phone was able to borrow was The Friend Zone by Abby Jimenez. And that is the book that I wanted to talk about today, because I saw quite a bit of scuttle about it online, which surprised me because I actually enjoyed it when it was just me.

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The “Too Long, Didn’t Read” Version

Kristen Petersen is a girl with a secret: it’s possible that she will never be able to have children once she undergoes a necessary medical procedure. She can’t share this information though. Not with Sloan, her best friend who is getting married, and absolutely not Josh, who is the best man in the wedding. Kristen also has to keep herself from letting him charm his way into her heart, and kids are something he has always dreamt of.

It is harder than it should be, since their best friends that they always hang out with are now hanging out with each other, Sloan’s thriftiness means that there is a lot of prep that is being done together. Can Kristen keep her secret and her heart to herself?

My Defense

When I first read the book, I gave it five stars, but hindsight is telling me that it might be more of a three-star book now. This is because I actually could not remember the premise of this book on my own, and then I feel like in trying to research and remember, I saw a lot of the commentary online. Sadly, most of it was hate.

And maybe you can say that I let the online discussion of the book get to my head, but ultimately the truth is the book is not memorable enough to be a five-star book. What I can give this book credit for is that I know I probably loved this book when I finished because it made me feel seen as a girl in this society. I loved Kristen because I believe she navigated the situation in the best way she could, because fertility is a sensitive subject that is also (implicitly) attached to value and worth.

There are arguments that she is annoying for leading the guys on and selfish for not telling them about the magnitude of her health issues.

My argument is that HIPPA exists for a reason—they are Kristen’s health issues, and she should have a right to share when she is ready. Why should she hinder her health and her healing process, stressing about telling everyone on a timeline that does not work for her? That isn’t going to heal her any quicker or make her feel better. She should not have to tell them until she is ready or believes that they are ready.

Is that selfish? Maybe. But from the beginning, she knows Josh wants kids, which is why she tries to dissuade him from pursuing her by saying that she is in a relationship. She doesn’t have to tell him anything because they are not anything. He should not get to know anything unless they’re looking at a future together.

Another critique I’ve seen of the book is that it should be considered trauma porn. Maybe I’ve seen and read too much, but my experience reading this book is that this is just how life goes. Sometimes nothing is happening alongside the growth of a relationship (rarely does that make for a good story though). But the reality is that life is happening all the time, in all different aspects, and to only tell the aspect of one (such as romance) without balancing it with other aspects (family, health, career, etc.) shows a lack of complexity. And I would rather read this and say it’s a good story, than read a one-dimensional romance.

Anyway, I realize now as I am looking back on this that this is more of a defense of the book than a review, so I have changed it and edited it to reflect that. Should I do more “in the defense of…” or just stick to reviews? Do you have a favorite romance novel? What should I read next? Let me know in the comments below!

I hope you've had fun in this downtime together <3

Kristi